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George W. Bush Jokes > Jokes

Best of Conan Obrien's George Bush jokes
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July 2005 - President Bush announced he was nominating Judge John Roberts to the Supreme Court. Bush said he picked Roberts because he had "one of the finest legal minds since Matlock." Yesterday, Bush had breakfast with Roberts. Afterward, Bush said he's never seen a better- qualified candidate for the Supreme Court, while Roberts said he's never seen a grown man eat Count Chocula.

July 2005 - In a speech this week, Hillary Clinton compared President Bush to Mad Magazine's Alfred E. Newman. After hearing this, the President said, "Finally, a literary reference I understand."

July 2005 - The White House says U.S. President Bush is in no hurry to fill the vacancy on the Supreme Court — which makes sense, since it took him four weeks to pick his favorite Teletubby.

July 2005 - Earlier today, U.S. President Bush was scheduled to give the commencement address at the U.S. Naval Academy. Unfortunately, there was a mix-up and Bush gave a 20-minute speech to the employees at an Old Navy.

July 2005 - President Bush announced he has decided to plan a trip to Vietnam. The President said, "It must be a pretty nice place, I heard John McCain spent five years there."

July 2005 - Despite protests from Conservatives, President Bush appointed an openly gay man as his assistant secretary of commerce. Bush claimed a gay man is perfect for the commerce department because, "Those people love to shop."

President Bush met with the President of South Korea. Things got off to an awkward start when President Bush asked, 'Are you from the good Korea or the bad Korea?'

A website is selling talking George W. Bush dolls that speak in the president's voice when you push a button. Apparently, the doll can mispronounce over 100 words.

Yesterday, a representative from the Canadian government called President Bush a moron. Bush was furious and said that's President Moron to you buddy!"

"Everyone is talking about the election results this week. The White House is still celebrating. President Bush is particularly happy since these are the only midterms he's ever done well on

"The New York Times is reporting that the Bush administration has a post-war plan to turn Iraq into a democracy. If the plan works it might be tried in Florida

According to USA Today, President Bush is featured in television commercials for more than a dozen congressional candidates. In fact the Bush commercials are so effective, he's in line to replace the 'Dude you're getting a Dell' guy."

The presidential race is heating up. Both John Kerry and Wesley Clark are campaigning this week with the men that saved both of their lives in Vietnam. President Bush is campaigning with a guy that once took a math test for him.

Source: Conan Obrien's Late Night TV Show (Website)

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Best of the late night jokes:
Jay Leno | Conan Obrien | David Letterman

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